Welcome to Ray Flatt's Weekly BubbaGram. Been watching the world and the news too much lately. When recently asked about what I thought about recent events I responded with the following question. "If a woman is knocking on the door of your front pouch, and a dog is barking on the back pouch, which do you let in first and why?" Everyone normally answers "the dog" but they don't really know why. The answer is "the dog" and reason is that they will quite down after you let em in. Thus, I ask, if a Mexican is standing on your South border and a Canadian is standing on your North border, which do you let in first and why? The obvious answer is "the Canadian", because he'll but away his flag and quite down after they get in this country. Don't get me wrong, I want everyone to have a better life, like most Americans I just want em do it in the proper manner (which I understand is harder to do than say) and learn to be good Americans after they legally get here. ------ Ever spend much time with old(er) folks. They are full of wisdom. Got to spend sometime with my Uncle Jed and Cousin Homer this past week who were setting on the front pouch and pondering the following thoughts (Cousin Homer took the time to write em down): Can you cry under water? How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered? Why do you have to "put your two cents in", but it's only a "penny for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going? Why does a round pizza come in a square box? How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage? Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up like every two hours? If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing? Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV? Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground? Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They're going to see you naked anyway. Why is "bra" singular and "panties" plural? Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat? If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about him? Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane? If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat? Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their lower parts when they ask where the bathroom is? Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs! If Wiley E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that ACME crap, why didn't he just buy dinner? If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from? If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons? Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune? Why did you just try singing the two songs above? ------ That's all from BubbaLand, talk to ya next week. Like always, if you have something to share with the group, just drop me an email. Be sure to pass this BubbaGram on to friends, enemy and family. They to can join the list at www.rayflatt.com. PS: If you got this eMail in error or would not like any future BubbaGrams (story on a weekly basis)...just send it back with the words UNSUBSCRIBE in the subject.