Welcome to Ray Flatt's Weekly BubbaGram July 19, 2006 Things have been a buzz in these parts of the country especially ever since Uncle Albert found Aunt Martha's secret wooden box hidden under the bed. He opened it up and found six kernels of corn and $120 in cash. This perplexed Uncle Albert since he and Aunt Martha had been married for almost 50 years and they weren't accustomed to keeping secrets from each other (or so he thought). Thus, Uncle Albert confronted Aunt Martha about the find. Aunt Martha meekly answered, "Well Albert, I knew the truth was going to come out someday and it looks like today is the day. You see every time I've ever been unfaithful to you by fooling around with the hired hands, I would put a grain/kernel of corn in that wooden box. Do you think you can find it in your heart to forgive me?" Needless to say Uncle Albert was shocked. Martha was the last person he ever thought about being unfaithful. But then again, Albert also realized that he wasn't always the most caring and loving husband that he ought to have been. Albert quickly surmised that six indiscretions was nothing to cause throwing away 50 years of marriage. Thus, he sofltly replied, "Why sure Martha, I forgive you. Seems like I need to ask you to forgive me for not being the husband I ought to have been. That explains the six kernels of corn, put what's the explanation about the $120?" Martha proudly proclaimed, "Every time the box would get full of corn kernels, I'd pour it in a bushel basket and when that basket would get full, then I'd sell it. Now we have $120." Think Uncle Albert ought to rethink his forgiveness? This must look as foolish to us as we do to God when He has to keep forgiving us of the same indiscretions over and over and over again. Wonder if we can sell em' and cash in. I don't think my indiscretions are spectacular enough for a movie deal. Somethin' tells me that we will cash em' someday when we meet our maker, if we don't unload them today. ----- A Mom was concerned about her kindergarten son walking to school. He didn't want his mother to walk with him. She wanted to give him the feeling that he had some independence but yet know that he was safe. So she had an idea of how to handle it. She asked a neighbor, Mrs. Goodnest, if she would please follow him to school in the mornings, staying at a distance, so he probably wouldn't notice her. Mrs. Goodnest said that since she was up early with her toddler anyway, it would be a good way for them to get some exercise as well, so she agreed. The next school day, Mrs. Goodnest and her little girl, Marcy, set out following behind Timmy as he walked to school with another neighbor boy he knew. She did this for the whole week. As the boys walked and chatted, kicking stones and twigs, Timmy's little friend noticed the same lady was following them as she seemed to do every day all week. Finally he said to Timmy, "Have you noticed that lady following us to school all week? Do you know her?" Timmy nonchalantly replied, "Yeah, I know who she is". The friend said, "Well, who is she"? "That's just Shirley Goodnest", Timmy replied, "and her daughter Marcy". "Shirley Goodnest? Who is she and why is she following us"? "Well", Timmy explained, "every night my Mom makes me say the 23rd Psalm with my prayers, 'cuz she worries about me so much. And in the Psalm, it says, 'Shirley Goodnest and Marcy shall follow me all the days of my life', so I guess I'll just have to get used to it"! May Goodness and Mercy follow you all the days of your life ------ Bubba-ism of the week - "Success is getting up one more time." ----- That's all from BubbaLand, talk to ya next week. Like always, if you have something to share with the group, just drop me an email. Be sure to pass this BubbaGram on to friends, enemies and family. They to can join the list at www.rayflatt.com. PS: If you got this eMail in error or would not like any future BubbaGrams (story on a weekly basis)...just send it back with the words UNSUBSCRIBE in the subject.